Over 3.5 years ago, VideoSift shared a funny 42 seconds YouTube video showing the differences between iPhone and ePhone. There are three more episodes/skits/sketches in its playlist.
Your overlord would take ePhone as a male ant who doesn't go move around and out much, need power, hardware customizations, clicky keyboards, rarely use the (tele)phones (except for dial-up modems), etc. :P